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My attraction to white hair...





 I miss the old days when nothing was nothing,and something was nothing.I miss the innocence of cluelessness and the wisdom of simplicity.I miss the days when  everything was a mystery yet to be known and exciting to find out about.



 A few days ago, a normal conversation that was    mostly  a complaint about how this year is quickly passing  by and those dreaded end of semester exams are just around the corner..the only optimistic thing about the conversation was musing about the soon-to-be reality  of clearing four years of tertiary education…then  the conversation took another gloomy turn as we started talking about the job hunting period after school.( At this point in our conversation i was slowly  realizing  my very pessimistic side) What started out as a simple conversation at lunch hour turned into a sneak preview of the future that lay ahead…the  jobs we wanted, the day  we start to lying  about our age,how many kids we want ,when we want to  get married, how  to start our own business.It was simply highlighting the events  of a to-do list for our future.Even though we all have our different paths and aspirations for the future, it was clear that the common factor there was the passing of time. The most interesting part of our conversations was when someone started plotting a plan for hiding her age once the ‘time’ reaches.It didn't come as a shock to me because it’s a known fact that most women lie about their ages, what was shocking (to everyone else) was that I couldn’t wait to get older!! I CAN’T WAIT for the day I will be happily saying am 30  and I won’t care about it!! I will be the proudest 30 year old woman if I have to!  There’s something about getting older that appeals to me, maybe it has its roots in my last born syndrome  for always wanting to be like my elder siblings, have a  mature conversation without holding back your tongue because everyone will think of you as young and foolish… you can hold me against my word in the next 10 years when I will be 31(yes, I said it my future actual age) I know I won’t change mind.
     But that’s not the reason why I wrote this post, I wrote this down when I couldn’t concentrate on revising for a paper because my head  couldn’t take in any more information and all I wanted was to release something from my brain…I needed a mental break.I started thinking about little kids and how envious I am of their sweet little innocent lives…they don’t have to think of some philosophy paper or database terms like the ones  that got jumbled up in my head a few days ago..their minds are practically blank!! Simplicity at its best, i don’t remember being that blank or clueless but I can only imagine how easy life is for them…the only contradiction to my story of envy is that I would give nothing to go back to those days..nothing! Like I stated before, I want to grow old.. I want to increase in age, I want to be 30,40,50,60,70,80, and God help me 100!! So with this dilemma of wanting to grow old yet wanting to be cluelessly young and foolish, I decided that all I can do is take what I have but still remain a little clueless at times…it will sound so cliché ,but I know better than to rush into growing up.Life is interesting,whether old or young…(age ain’t nothing but a number!!)
I have  4 exam papers left and all I can say is all the best to everyone in the same situation as me… some things don't last   forever,especially exams.

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